So...

SO.

I kinda feel like the whole everyday thing went down the drain.

But I'll post when I need to, because that was the whole point of this anyway.

Now then, the topic for today is guys.

Because I like this guy and I was planning to ask him out but then I found out that one of my friends already asked him out and he said maybe. So me and her agreed that whoever he chose, the other of us would accept it. And then my therapist told me to go for it because I need to get over the fact that I'm super shy.

So I asked him out over Facebook and he said maybe after finals are over because he needs to study.

And then I found out that he asked my friend if she wants to study with him tomorrow.

And then she said I should go with them to study.

But isn't that cheating? I dunno-- now I'm making it sound like some sort of competition.

The fact of the matter is though, I may have said that I would accept it if he chose her, but inside it's kinda eating away at me that he asked her to study with him.

On a different note, my friend since I was 3 months old has officially become a serious bitch. I put up a picture online for one of my friends to see because she was asking me about my new bathing suit. A lot of my friends said "Oh Rebecca! That is sooo cute!" Of course, my oldest, bestest friend had to call me a 'tai fei le.' According to google translate, this basically means that she was calling me a waste of space.

And last Friday she kept telling me I was ugly.

That really isn't the way you should act towards anyone, even if you think that they'll assume you're joking.

And I feel like I can't trust her with anything and it's killing me.

I feel like she thinks she's sooooo much better than me just because she's popular. She thinks she's wayyyyy cuter than me. Actually though, I think that if you look past her bleached hair with colorful streaks and the pounds of make up she wears everyday, she's not really that cute at all.

She has started to really piss me off, and I can't take it.

She has no idea what's going on in my life and she assumes its all sugar and roses.

Actually though, in every single online test there is about it, I score as at LEAST mildly depressed.

Life is just a load of crap for me, and no one bothers to see how I feel about anything.

So here's hoping therapy helps.